On the subject of Friends - a new look

The foundation for this blog was born from the fascination of Facebook and MySpace Friends. My very first post discussed this issue. Following a "news feed" item, I now see that I am not the only one that is fascinated with the subject.

A new group has been formed on Facebook called interestingly enough "Facebook friends aren't really your friends." The description of the group goes thusly... When you look at your list of friends on Facebook ask yourself. Are these people really my friends? Or am I just collecting them to show the world how many I can rack up. What do you think?"

The news feed post was produced by the fact that one of my "friends" had just joined this group. This "friend" was and is a fraternity brother of mine. In the realm of Greek world, your brothers are always your brothers. I talk to one of them now, and that was after a long time without even a word. 

When one of my fraternity brothers appeared under "people you may know," I thought it would be a good contact. But is he a "friend" in the true definition. I think so, but a close friend... no.

My best friend in sixth grade was Bill. He moved away shortly thereafter, and I lost touch. When I found him again through the world of blogging, then Facebook, I contacted him to become "friends," hoping to catch up. I was accepted as a friend, but apparently, there wasn't any desire to catch up on his part. As a matter of fact, it seems like he is confused with how to deal with his "friends."

One post on his status said "Now that I have all these Facebook friends, what do I do with them?" My answer appeared on his wall and stated, "You asked what to do about Facebook friends. The short answer is enjoy their company. Have fun seeing their status changes... view a few photos, or post some of your own. Get reconnected with those who you might want to talk to... share some news. Or, just don't do anything with it. It's the beauty of the virtual world, you can do what you want to do, if you want to do it."

Two days ago, he posted a new status item that said, "apparently I am going to become Facebook friends with everyone I ever knew." That, to me, is a good thing as I love to reminisce with people, especially ones who had a special place in my life, as ironically, this person did. I may be his "friend," but it seems like he's only comfortable at leaving it at that, nothing more.

I have only one occasion to introduce myself to someone by saying, "hi, we're actually Facebook friends." The person I introduced myself to laughed and said "so THAT'S were I know you from." We discussed how nice it was to finally meet in person.  We both work with a local improv group, and would have eventually met, but the fact that we had "Facebook" in common allowed me to know her better. At the same time, she might have wondered "who is this guy?" as well. So, in essence, we were already introduced before meeting.

So back to the question posed by the new group. Am I just trying to gather as many friends as I can? No. Do I think that every friend is a real friend? No. Do I have a personal relationship with all my "friends?" For the most part, I can say yes... at about 95 percent.

For me, Facebooking is a great way to enjoy a social circle that allows me to learn more about people I have a relationship with, through work, or play, or school, and I don't see anything wrong with that.

To everyone who has accepted me as a "friend," I say thank you. I appreciate the honor. To me, asking to be a friend or accepting a friend is simple... it says I know you and would appreciate the opportunity to share my world with you, to whatever extent you wish."

So does it matter that Facebook Friends aren't your real friends? I believe it is the relationship you have is what makes a friend.. and if the cyber friendship can turn into something genuine, and further what is already there, it's something truly great.

Good night, my friends, present and future!

Yours truly,

Johnny Blogger