On the subject of Disconnecting

Hi, my name is Johnny and I am addicted to connections.

(Hello, Johnny.)

I can't leave my e-mail alone for more than 15 minutes. I am a Facebook addict. I have to be near a computer to read or write a blog. In short, I have to feel a connection through this thing called cyberspace.

Some people call me overboard (my wife). Some call me obsessed (my kids). You can call me your Facebook friend. (I am, aren't I? And if I am not, by golly don't you think I ought to be?)

The fact is that with a pretty tough work schedule most of the time and a family of a wife, two kids, three cats, two dogs and three laptops, I have a lot on my plate. And when there is leftover time, I like to live vicariously through status updates and comments. (Oh how I love those little red dots that notify me of notifications, unless someone has sent me a Little Pea Patch plant or asks me to take a true age test... ignore!)

There is a tremendous appreciation for the status update, and how it makes me feel like I am in a party room where I am constantly saying "How you Doin?" in my best Joey voice. On Facebook, they answer before the question and I like that.

And then there is my cell phone, which rarely leaves my side, and is a constant source of texting and Facebook Mobile for iPhone. I know, pitiful.

However, I have entered a 7 day program this Summer where I shall succumb to a 1 step plan to take me away from all these connections. Today, my wife and I booked a cruise for our family.

You say "now wait a minute there, Skipper! Don't the ships have internet cafes now?" Why, yes they do little buddy. However, I have only paid for internet access once in my life, and that was for work purposes. And as for the iPhone, it's staying at home.

So from now until our country's birthday, it's addiction as usual, but for seven days in July, it shall be wonderful to be disconnected. I wonder if it will change my outlook when I return. Okay, probably not, but there's always a trip to Cyberspace Rehab? But I said, no, no, no.

Yours truly,
Amy Winehouse... er... Johnny Blogger