On the subject of I don't know... a new chapter.

Last blog I said it's more important to know what you don't know.

Here are some of the things I don't know how to do...

I don't know how to use Twitter effectively. I can explain what it is to my friends and watch them RT and # and @ all day long, but I can barely figure out how to follow someone.

I don't know how to effectively coach a kid's soccer team. I took over a team when the coach bailed and the aggregate score of our first two games has been 24-3. And that is with my son getting 14 saves in each game as goalie.

I don't know how to be an auctioneer. A few years ago, I was asked to conduct a live auction at my kid's school's spring arts festival. The item, a quilt, went for 750 dollars. For some reason, this made me the new school auctioneer. In these tough economic times, it's hard to get people to part with their money. Tonight, I auctioned three items and two were purchased at bargain prices, but still a chunk of change. Sadly, it was my wife who bought both.

I don't know how to pick good produce at the grocery store or cook anything other than steak. When I do try to do something more complicated, heaven help the victims.

I don't know how to find places I have been before. The other day I had an appointment at a place I have driven by, but never been to. Sadly, when I needed to find it, it took three calls to my wife, and this was after I found it on my Google maps on the iPhone. Turns out, I drove past the place twice while trying to find it.

I don't know how to stay up past 11 without something to engage me. I have started to fall asleep in the middle of my favorite television shows, just like I used to kid my dad about doing not that long ago. What am I? 70 now? Get me the senior menu. If I am doing something like Karaoke or being at a show, I am fine, but at home, someone must be turning on the sleeping gas.

Sadly, I don't know how to finish this blog as I started with a long list and now it's gone from memory. Must be time for me to go to bed. Getting old... not much fun.

Good night, and good luck to you and you and you.

Yours truly,
Johnny Blogger