Hello, scale. You have been nice to me. Last year, you fell faster than the stock market. I liked that. Um, the scale, not the stock market.. that stunk.
Now you are "trying to make an adjustment" and have those numbers go back up. I mean the scale and the stock market this time. For that I am mad at you. (the scale, not the stock market.)
For months, people have been glowing at me. Or is that gushing.
"Oh, you have lost weight."
"Oh, you look so good."
"Oh, Mr. Clooney."
Okay, maybe not that last one, but people have been much nicer and more complimentary.
I have found it easier to bound up the stairs at work (um, when I feel like getting to work.) I have found it easier to get to sleep (now that I take Ambien again.) And the half coke/half diet coke mix at Chipotle has been working like a charm! So much that I now have three of them before I am finished, and that's after I have stopped and had one at the local Circle K to wake me up in the morning.
And I am writing more than ever. At least, that is what I intend to do, but something is always coming up like life or work or going to the gym. Wait, I haven't been to the gym so that's not the reason.
I looked at the calendar and it lies to me to. It says I am old now. It says I am more than half way to 90 and that I could go all Jack Bauer cliffhanger any minute. Damn it!
So, Mr. Scale. I am talking to you. I am tired of you mocking me, and I am going to attempt once again to prove you wrong so you will once again feel so right.
I have a premiere to get ready for... September 11th (lovely day for a premiere, but I don't forget it.) I want to take the stage happy with my looks to make people laugh with me instead of at me.
Will you be my friend again? And by that I mean a real friend, not one of those people who wants to Facebook friend me after hearing I was a slim guy who turned out to be portly.
Okay, I am leaving now. I see a pair of warmups and running shoes in my future. I'll see you later.
Yours truly,
Johnny Blogger
Showing posts with label challenges. Show all posts
Showing posts with label challenges. Show all posts
Tuesday, May 19, 2009
Wednesday, March 18, 2009
On the subject of Refocusing
I have been reading the news, hearing the reports, seeing the statistics. Now I know what they are talking about.
Yesterday, I was dealt a first hand blow courtesy of the new economy of America. My job over the next few days is to figure out how to do what I have been doing for the last two years, and for less pay and with less help. Welcome to the new reality.
My first reaction was to be bitter and angry, Then I remembered something written by a fellow blogger in her most recent post. She said "We are not the job we do, the house or car or big plasma screen TV in our possession... yet, if you end up losing those items or experiences in your present moment, and you feel pain and suffering at that loss, that means your ego is attached to those things. You have the power, in that moment, to honor and recognize those emotions because it's a wonderful opportunity to get back in to alignment with who you truly are. What you focus on grows."
My ego had taken a huge blow as all I could think about is all the hard work I had put into this particular project... the extra hours of production... the constant thought process of how to make it better. All I could think was "I did all this and this is how they repay me?"
My wife had to spend many hours talking me down. She reminded me not to take it personally, which was all I was doing. The reason was not for the work I was losing, but for the news I would have to give others that their job was being cut back, eliminated or asking them to do their great work and not get paid as much for it.
The second call I had to make was someone who had been with me from day one on the project. It was not enough that in the past month or so, his son was the victim of a terrible accident, or on this very day, that he was losing his father in law. No, now, it was time, albeit the wrong time, to tell him that despite all his hard work, that we were going to have to figure out a different way to work together.
This morning, I didn't even want to get out of bed. I worked through the day, productive as I could be, but still with the guilt and distraction. Then, after dinner, headache still a present companion, I decided to open up the computer and write. First, redoing my Facebook status from earlier in the day which read "here's hoping people understand that what happens in the business world does not effect the way I think about people on a personal level."
The new one reads: "is remembering to breathe. Okay. Now that I have reminded myself, I must remember to continue doing it. Okay. So far so good. Oops. Mind Wandered." Even with everything in life, I still keep my sense of humor (much like a cherished other fellow blogger.)
It was at that moment I decided to go back to reading some blogs, and was guided back to that post. I felt pain and suffering because it was all about my ego... the way people think of me. It was not something I could control, thus it was a great source of stress. But as a card given to me once said "no one can ever make you believe anything you don't want to believe."
Again, I focused on the blog's meaning. Take inventory of what is good. Those of you who know me and those who read this blog understand I know how to do that. With that as a benchmark, here goes:
I have a wife who loves me and believes in me every moment of every day.
I have two kids who love me and one who even makes me laugh most of the time.
I still can make my mortgage payments and even do some fun things, which makes me luckier than many of the people I know.
I know that in this world, I have a higher meaning to my life that I have yet to find, and that this experience is pushing me to find it even harder now.
I know that by merely writing these words that at least one person will take solace in the fact that they are doing okay and should take inventory themselves.
So the refocusing commences, as I learn to take care of myself in new ways - focusing inward so that the radiance and joy can flow outwards. For someone who is happy 98 percent of the time, it's an adjustment to get out of the land of the blues, but step one of the journey starts now.
Thanks Kim.
Yours truly,
Johnny Blogger
P.S. - My son just came out wearing his "My Dad Rocks" shirt, with a note attached below it. It said "no matter what!" He seemed so happy to show it to me. Now that is what life is all about.
Yesterday, I was dealt a first hand blow courtesy of the new economy of America. My job over the next few days is to figure out how to do what I have been doing for the last two years, and for less pay and with less help. Welcome to the new reality.
My first reaction was to be bitter and angry, Then I remembered something written by a fellow blogger in her most recent post. She said "We are not the job we do, the house or car or big plasma screen TV in our possession... yet, if you end up losing those items or experiences in your present moment, and you feel pain and suffering at that loss, that means your ego is attached to those things. You have the power, in that moment, to honor and recognize those emotions because it's a wonderful opportunity to get back in to alignment with who you truly are. What you focus on grows."
My ego had taken a huge blow as all I could think about is all the hard work I had put into this particular project... the extra hours of production... the constant thought process of how to make it better. All I could think was "I did all this and this is how they repay me?"
My wife had to spend many hours talking me down. She reminded me not to take it personally, which was all I was doing. The reason was not for the work I was losing, but for the news I would have to give others that their job was being cut back, eliminated or asking them to do their great work and not get paid as much for it.
The second call I had to make was someone who had been with me from day one on the project. It was not enough that in the past month or so, his son was the victim of a terrible accident, or on this very day, that he was losing his father in law. No, now, it was time, albeit the wrong time, to tell him that despite all his hard work, that we were going to have to figure out a different way to work together.
This morning, I didn't even want to get out of bed. I worked through the day, productive as I could be, but still with the guilt and distraction. Then, after dinner, headache still a present companion, I decided to open up the computer and write. First, redoing my Facebook status from earlier in the day which read "here's hoping people understand that what happens in the business world does not effect the way I think about people on a personal level."
The new one reads: "is remembering to breathe. Okay. Now that I have reminded myself, I must remember to continue doing it. Okay. So far so good. Oops. Mind Wandered." Even with everything in life, I still keep my sense of humor (much like a cherished other fellow blogger.)
It was at that moment I decided to go back to reading some blogs, and was guided back to that post. I felt pain and suffering because it was all about my ego... the way people think of me. It was not something I could control, thus it was a great source of stress. But as a card given to me once said "no one can ever make you believe anything you don't want to believe."
Again, I focused on the blog's meaning. Take inventory of what is good. Those of you who know me and those who read this blog understand I know how to do that. With that as a benchmark, here goes:
I have a wife who loves me and believes in me every moment of every day.
I have two kids who love me and one who even makes me laugh most of the time.
I still can make my mortgage payments and even do some fun things, which makes me luckier than many of the people I know.
I know that in this world, I have a higher meaning to my life that I have yet to find, and that this experience is pushing me to find it even harder now.
I know that by merely writing these words that at least one person will take solace in the fact that they are doing okay and should take inventory themselves.
So the refocusing commences, as I learn to take care of myself in new ways - focusing inward so that the radiance and joy can flow outwards. For someone who is happy 98 percent of the time, it's an adjustment to get out of the land of the blues, but step one of the journey starts now.
Thanks Kim.
Yours truly,
Johnny Blogger
P.S. - My son just came out wearing his "My Dad Rocks" shirt, with a note attached below it. It said "no matter what!" He seemed so happy to show it to me. Now that is what life is all about.
Thursday, July 3, 2008
On the subject of Life's Challenges
Sometimes, we have no idea how lucky we are.
In the past 24 hours, I have been floored by things I have read about people with whom I have shared a significant part of my life. In both cases, we have not kept in touch, merrily walking down our own paths, not seeing what challenges the others have faced, or are facing. Then, we take a glimpse onto their road and simply say, oh my God.
The first was an e-mail I received from a close friend from college. We had dated in my freshman year, but were always more friends, but very deep soultouching friends. A heart condition took her away from school and took her back home, so our friendship was lost to the battle of distance, but her place in my life remains.
Now to that e-mail. She shared details with me of her life since college, and while I will not public ally share her thoughts, I can say this. The courage to share true feelings with someone so many years later is truly a gift from above, especially when those words can be fraught with unknowing territory that could easily alienate even the closest of friends. Before I moved to Atlanta and expanded my circle of friends, the words I received last night would have made me run away, with a lack of knowledge and compassion sending me in that direction. Now, I believe her choices have made her even stronger and a better person.
One remarkable story she did share, and that I will share with you is one of a journey none of us would ever want to take, but one she feels is a lucky blessing. My friend drowned and died a couple of years ago.
Let that sit with you for a moment. She died.
For some reason that is known only to her, she was revived and lived on, but for those moments, she had passed, and was given a pass back. She shares with me now that everything, from even watching an ant on a blade of grass, is an adventure. She learned that life was not something that should ever be taken for granted, and passed on those words to me as I look at my life. Those words rank among the most powerful I have read in my lifetime.
One e-mail had me searching my soul, and exploring my own thoughts... incredible enough if it ended there.
Fast forward to this afternoon, I was surfing around the net, seeing if Tiffany Verzal, a former editor for my company, was going to be at a convention I am attending next week. I had given her an opportunity right out of college, and now, because of her great talent, is working at a University with her husband, making great videos and television.
Tiff had made the choice to leave her Seattle life behind and has not kept in touch. I was saddened by her choice, but people have a reason for moving on, and while I love to rekindle connections, some people want to cut and move on. There is no right or wrong about it... it's just personal choice.
Casually, I went to the school's website, where the athletic director blogs about his staff. My hopes were to see what my former colleague was up to, and if she and her husband were going to be at the conference - one they attend every year. They had missed last year's though, as Tiffany had just given birth to a beautiful daughter.
So off I went to the blog, expecting something that would be good and allow me to catch up with a friend. That is when I read the following...
The last month and a half have been quite a challenge for two of our 12th Man Productions staffers Brandon and Tiffany Verzal. Their 14-month old daughter Alexis is undergoing rehab related to a serious brain trauma. It's a heart wrenching story which has captured the heart of our entire Athletic Department family, and also touched people around the country who have read about Alexis on the internet.
The outpouring of support for the Verzal family continues. Our soccer coach G. Guerrieri is dedicating his foundation's fund raising efforts this year in support of Alexis' medical expenses. You can learn more about this special child on CoachG.com.
Floored. No other way to put it. Hours after being uplifted by a message of hope, the world seems to drop an anvil straight out of a Looney Tunes cartoon. Floored.
I will eventually write her a note, but realize she has a lot more to do than read e-mails from people she may or may not want to hear from. What I can do is try to spiritually give her some support from others. I urge you to click on the article above and read about their struggles, and if you can... put them in your thoughts and prayers.
Yes, we all face life's challenges. We can be empowered by their results. We can be devastated by them as well. If it were not for being lost in this cyberspace, I would have gleefully walked down my own path and not known either of these stories. Never have I been so privileged to have been lost.
Good night, baby Alexis... we're thinking about you!
Yours truly,
Johnny Blogger
In the past 24 hours, I have been floored by things I have read about people with whom I have shared a significant part of my life. In both cases, we have not kept in touch, merrily walking down our own paths, not seeing what challenges the others have faced, or are facing. Then, we take a glimpse onto their road and simply say, oh my God.
The first was an e-mail I received from a close friend from college. We had dated in my freshman year, but were always more friends, but very deep soultouching friends. A heart condition took her away from school and took her back home, so our friendship was lost to the battle of distance, but her place in my life remains.
Now to that e-mail. She shared details with me of her life since college, and while I will not public ally share her thoughts, I can say this. The courage to share true feelings with someone so many years later is truly a gift from above, especially when those words can be fraught with unknowing territory that could easily alienate even the closest of friends. Before I moved to Atlanta and expanded my circle of friends, the words I received last night would have made me run away, with a lack of knowledge and compassion sending me in that direction. Now, I believe her choices have made her even stronger and a better person.
One remarkable story she did share, and that I will share with you is one of a journey none of us would ever want to take, but one she feels is a lucky blessing. My friend drowned and died a couple of years ago.
Let that sit with you for a moment. She died.
For some reason that is known only to her, she was revived and lived on, but for those moments, she had passed, and was given a pass back. She shares with me now that everything, from even watching an ant on a blade of grass, is an adventure. She learned that life was not something that should ever be taken for granted, and passed on those words to me as I look at my life. Those words rank among the most powerful I have read in my lifetime.
One e-mail had me searching my soul, and exploring my own thoughts... incredible enough if it ended there.
Fast forward to this afternoon, I was surfing around the net, seeing if Tiffany Verzal, a former editor for my company, was going to be at a convention I am attending next week. I had given her an opportunity right out of college, and now, because of her great talent, is working at a University with her husband, making great videos and television.
Tiff had made the choice to leave her Seattle life behind and has not kept in touch. I was saddened by her choice, but people have a reason for moving on, and while I love to rekindle connections, some people want to cut and move on. There is no right or wrong about it... it's just personal choice.
Casually, I went to the school's website, where the athletic director blogs about his staff. My hopes were to see what my former colleague was up to, and if she and her husband were going to be at the conference - one they attend every year. They had missed last year's though, as Tiffany had just given birth to a beautiful daughter.
So off I went to the blog, expecting something that would be good and allow me to catch up with a friend. That is when I read the following...
The last month and a half have been quite a challenge for two of our 12th Man Productions staffers Brandon and Tiffany Verzal. Their 14-month old daughter Alexis is undergoing rehab related to a serious brain trauma. It's a heart wrenching story which has captured the heart of our entire Athletic Department family, and also touched people around the country who have read about Alexis on the internet.
The outpouring of support for the Verzal family continues. Our soccer coach G. Guerrieri is dedicating his foundation's fund raising efforts this year in support of Alexis' medical expenses. You can learn more about this special child on CoachG.com.
Floored. No other way to put it. Hours after being uplifted by a message of hope, the world seems to drop an anvil straight out of a Looney Tunes cartoon. Floored.
I will eventually write her a note, but realize she has a lot more to do than read e-mails from people she may or may not want to hear from. What I can do is try to spiritually give her some support from others. I urge you to click on the article above and read about their struggles, and if you can... put them in your thoughts and prayers.
Yes, we all face life's challenges. We can be empowered by their results. We can be devastated by them as well. If it were not for being lost in this cyberspace, I would have gleefully walked down my own path and not known either of these stories. Never have I been so privileged to have been lost.
Good night, baby Alexis... we're thinking about you!
Yours truly,
Johnny Blogger
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